UX Writing Challenge: Day 1

Writing cancellation notifications

I've signed up for the UX Writers Collective daily challenges to sharpen my skills and let the creative juices flow.

This was my first assignment:

Scenario: A traveler is in an airport waiting for the last leg of a flight home when their flight gets abruptly canceled due to bad weather.

Challenge: Write a message from the airline app notifying them of the cancellation and what they need to do next.

Headline: 45 characters
Body: 175 characters max
Button(s): 25 characters max

This is what I came up with:

UX Writing Challenge Day 1

Fellow Writers' Feedback

I shared my first idea on LinkedIn. A few kind writers gave me this feedback:

1. Why was the flight canceled?
2. As a user, I might not want to be booked on the next flight.
3. I would want to choose the hotel.

When I came up with my original text, I read the UX Writers Collective post on how to write cancellation notifications.

After reading the feedback, I've changed it to this:

UX Writing Challenge Day 1 — Revised

Which one do you think works best?